Halloweeny!

I was talking to my best friend this morning and we concluded that Halloween is only really awesome if you fit into one of these categories:

{1} You're a kid;

{2} You have kids;

{3} You're in college.

That's not to say I'm a total Hallowinch {see what I did there <-- Halloween Grinch. Clever, eh? No? Point taken.} But I have to be at work at 8:30 tomorrow so a wild party just ain't happenin' at our house tonight. I plan to wear funky Halloween socks and watch DVR shows with my hubby, getting joyfully interrupted every few minutes to answer the doorbell and inadvertently contribute to childhood poor dental health. I adore cute trick or treaters, especially little ones who can't say it right and say, "Twick oh Tweet" or just stand there blankly while their parents awkwardly urge them. Gah I could eat 'em up.

However, these creatures are celebrating big this year...

My parents' dog, Moose, as Tigger. That underbite melts my heart!

My best friend, Erin's, Chihuahua, Lily the Taco. Glenn suggested a bell around her neck so she can be "Taco Bell" ~ I married a brilliant one!

Holly's Halloween candy PJs. Puppy-butt-exposing pet clothing ~ I die. And that blur? Her wagging nub. Sorry, is my obsession showing? :)

Have you met my other dog? He's HOT. I truly crack myself up. But seriously, this happened in Target and judgment eyes were cast upon us. I'm thinking it was probably the jazz hands that drew attention?

Happy Halloween, y'all!!

Songs About Me

Or just a list about me, because at this point in my life I haven't been lucky enough to meet Adam Levine and provide him divine songwriting inspiration by way of my endless charm and dashing good looks. {Ha. As if. So, anyone care to guess my celeb crush?}

I love reading other bloggers' lists and random "bet ya didn't know" posts where I find out pointlessly fun information about their personal lives. And I'm being clearly presumptuous that you care to find out the same information about me! Here goes...

1. I loathe showering. That's not to say I walk around stanky, because I don't. I shower every day but I just hate it. There's the "it's early, must I get naked and freeze until the water warms up?" part, then the "freeze when you open the curtain and cold air rushes in" part, and then the actual "process of getting ready from start to finish" part ~ none of these appeal to me.

2. I once went into anaphylactic shock after receiving allergy shots. Ironic, no? I survived, and now know what it feels like if my throat starts to close up.

3. I actually enjoy doing dishes!

4. Criminal Minds is my favorite TV show but I have trouble sleeping every week after watching it. {Shemar Moore is worth the exhaustion.}

5. I only drink water, hot tea, and coffee. Absolutely no cokes for this girl! {K, fine, I also drink alcohol. I cannot tell a lie. Red wine is heart-healthy though!}

6. In 2011 I had to have both big toenails surgically removed. *Cringes and gags* It was a rough year.

7. Growing up I told my mom I wanted to be "a single woman who lives alone in a townhouse and adopts kids. Or maybe never has kids at all. And if I do ever get married, I'll be way older." Hmm, so naturally I live in an actual house, got married at 22, and can't wait to be a mom one day!

8. My suitcasepurse usually weighs about 10 lbs. I weighed it on the airport scale once. Ridonkulous.

9. I adore getting snail mail and am sad it's dying out :(

10. Those videos of soldiers returning from war and surprising their loved ones? Send me into a tearful tailspin every. single. time. 

11. I'm horrible at giving surprises and also hate getting them {which deep down I think means I love it.} Whenever I have a gift to give someone, I get so excited that I usually end up giving it away entirely and gifting early! Case in point: Glenn got his Christmas present {a grill} the first week of November last year.

12. I hate basketball and my March generally lacks Madness.

13. I did gymnastics from ages 3-12 and was a cheerleader for 8 years {5th-12th grade}.

14. I have 4 tattoos and am always wanting more. It's true, they're addictive!

15. I wear reading glasses because I'm blind as a bat to up-close things. I thought farsightedness was totally fake and weird, until I had it!

16. I went to the Vegas Chippendales show for my bachelorette party with my MOH and my {awesomely cool} mom. I was called up on the stage, touched some rock hard abs, and got a free poster to prove it. #lifeiscomplete.

17. I floss my teeth every night and fear endless cavities if I forget. Getting a root canal a week after your wedding will do that to ya!

18. Glenn and I dream of moving back to Tennessee one day.

19. In June 2012 I stopped eating red meat. It's been almost five months and I don't miss it one bit!

20. If I could I'd leave Christmas decorations up year-round and exclusively listen to holiday music. I definitely missed my calling as an elf!
~ ~ ~
And because a post isn't a post without pictures, here's documentation of the day last week that I dog-shamed Holly for getting on the couch while we were at work. {Those pillows+blanket were ON that couch when we left that morning! And I'd love to hear her explanation of the dog-hair-covered couch cushions.} But those EARS make me all melty and forgiving of her antics :)

I hope you enjoyed learning random things about me that you didn't even know you didn't know!

Gettin' Saucy

As I've mentioned before, I'm the worst person to request a recipe from because I can't remember the last time I actually followed one. I'm a dash-of-this, oh-that-might-taste-good, eh-why-the-hell-not-throw-that-in-there, kind of home cook. Often my list of variations and changes is longer than the recipe itself! But to each her own ~ if you crave the peace of mind a rigid recipe brings, I envy you because you've probably had far less kitchen flops than TriesToBeAChef Alexa :)

Which brings me to... If you do love following a recipe, today's post might make your nerves a little jittery. Asian food is one of my favorites, and definitely the food "genre" I crave most. As in, I might bite your finger if you put fried rice in front of me and don't move your hand in time. That said, I truly love healthy eating and know I can't have both fried rice every day and a healthy heart+flat tummy. So, I do my best to make my own satisfying Asian spice/sauce blends to add to everything I can! Here's a list of Asian spices + sauces that I always keep in my spice cabinet {and "always" means, if I'm within weeks of running out I'll go ahead and buy more. One can never be too cautious when it comes to a stocked condiment cabinet.}

{1} Chili-garlic sauce and/or Sriracha sauce

{2} Rice vinegar

{3} Good ol' fashioned sesame seeds

{4} Pure sesame seed oil

{5} Toasted sesame oil

4+5 are somewhat interchangeable to my palate, but are definitely not the same thing. The only reason Toasted isn't in the picture is because I for realz ran out. Like, empty bottle, shook-it-to-the-last-godforsaken-drop ran out. For shame. 

{6} Low-sodium soy sauce

{7} Fish sauce ~ this is definitely not for everyone. Even I can only tolerate a little bit. Es feeshy!

My go-to when I'm craving Asian rice is simple ~ Trader Joe's Organic Brown Rice {already cooked, just microwave for 3 minutes!} tossed with any combination of the above sauces. I usually do a splash of rice vinegar, splash of soy sauce, plenty of sesame oil(s), a teeeeny bit of chili sauce, and oodles of sesame seeds for good measure. Again, I have no measurements to give you, but it's heaven in a bowl for this wannabe hibachi chef. 

Other uses for these sauces and spices include:

My spicy kale chips {chili-garlic sauce or Sriracha}

Asian-inspired roasted Brussels sprouts {Click here for A Cup of Jo's real recipe for the fish sauce combo. But I always use some combo of ALL of my sauces! +most of the original recipe ingredients}

Quick & Easy cucumber salad {rice vinegar is great in cucumber salads. For my go-to recipe, I generally use rice vinegar+chili-garlic+sesame seeds+toasted sesame oil+honey+a splash of water} 

Now that I've made your little recipe-followin' palms sweat, let me know what your must-have spices/sauces are! Anything I'm missing out on??

Vols vs. Gamecocks 2012

This weekend was incredible but it went by entirely too fast! Saturday we ventured down to Columbia, SC to see our Vols play the Gamecocks at Williams-Brice Stadium. {Let's just say, it's no Neyland!}

Much to our surprise, South Carolina's own Darius Rucker was there to sing the National Anthem! Obsessedwithhim is an understatement.

Thanks to my amazing husband, we also had great seats! And by great, I mean yours truly had a fantastic view of some football-pants-enveloped booty. 

Here come our boys!

Hey there, Coach Dooley!

Justin Hunter's mom standing right in front of us! She raised quite a player :)

This was the first time we've been to a football game at the opposing team's stadium rather than Neyland, and it was definitely strange to feel like a foreigner {with lots of judgment eyes on our orange attire!}. I told Glenn I realized what I truly missed was being part of the home team's traditions. At Neyland, we yell Rocky Top with the band until our lungs ache and we cheer wildly as our hound dog mascot, Smokey, runs the end zone post-touchdown. I was dying to Sandstorm it up with the Cocky fans, but then I remembered, THIS IS THE SEC and rivalry. is. everything! Gaaah I love this conference.

Rivalry is everything, that is, until one of the best football players in the country gets injured. Marcus Lattimore, USC's standout running back and such a respectable player, took a clean hit in the legs from one of our players and immediately we all knew it was bad. I saw the hit happen and as I glanced up at the screen and saw the way his leg lay on the field, I felt sick to my stomach. All of us in the stands were on our feet, and I've never heard a college football stadium so eerily silent. No matter what color you were wearing Saturday, your heart ached for Marcus, for his family, for his future. And I was so proud of the sportsmanship and respect the Volunteer players showed by taking the field in support and surrounding an injured opponent, right alongside his own teammates.

Despite the sadness surrounding Marcus's injury {turns out his knee is hyperextended and there is ligament damage, but he'll likely be back to play one day!}, and our personal sadness that the Vols lost 38-35, we had so much fun and are grateful that we're able to go to at least one Vols game each season. And just to make you say, "Seriously, WTF?!" here's a picture of some fellow Vols fans sitting near us...

Keeping that Volunteer fan blood flowin', baby!

Go Big Orange! See you in Knox in a few weeks!

Kale, that weird superfood

So, to somehow compensate for my uninhibited adoration for dessert-y Greek yogurt, my dinner tonight was super colorful! 

For starters, I have a totally healthy love affair with spicy kale chips. I make them at least once a week and will eat a bushel of kale in one sitting! Tonight, I mixed a whole bushel of kale with a whole head of broccoli and roasted them to crisp, spicy perfection!

Preheat over to 400F. Then simply: 

{1} pull kale leaves off stalk & pull apart broccoli; 

{2} wash, pat dry, then toss with EVOO and, if you like a little kick, some sriracha or Asian chili-garlic sauce ~ it doesn't take much! 

{3} toss on a baking pan covered with nonstick foil; 

{4} shake a little garlic salt over and roast 20-ish minutes or until desired crispiness. 

I honestly could have made an entire meal out of this heaping bowl of greens. I love my veggies!

As my other side, I grilled some sliced sweet potato sticks on the stove in my grill pan {a kitchen essential!} with a little EVOO and tossed some cinnamon on them for extra sweetness!

{The rest of our dinner was Trader Joe's crab cakes and crab-stuffed flounder ~ I'm not super pleased, or proud, of the ingredients in these, so I didn't have much and don't buy them often. Glenn also had a whole avocado on the side ~ told you, we like COLOR in this house!}

Then since the over was already preheated, I went ahead and roasted a fresh acorn squash {bought at the apple barn in TN!} to have as leftovers for tomorrow's lunch/dinner. My baking pans certainly got a workout tonight! I've never roasted acorn squash myself but I love it in restaurants {and the grilled kind my dad makes. To die for!} I plan to make a small batch of light cinnamon butter to mix with it tomorrow night!

Perfect caramelization!

What's your favorite colorful vegetable? Have you ventured into the world of kale or tried delicious kale chips? <-- DO IT and thank me later :) 

It's All Greek to Me!

I honestly didn't think Greek yogurt could get any better. I mean, that stuff is eat-2-or-3-cups-per-day good! My loyalty completely lies with Chobani brand because {1} it's fun to say, {2} they have tons of delicious flavors, and {3} Target always has it on sale. I can't decide which reason is best!

I now present you the unhealthier version of Greek yogurt. Which is still called Greek yogurt on the label so I'm totally passing it off as healthy. <--this is why I'm not a healthy living blogger.

Though I usually buy the individual serving cups so I can grab one {or two. or three.} from the fridge and take it to work, this one only comes in the huge 16-oz. container. Wait, it's not meant to be eaten in one sitting? Oops!

Shine On

Moonshine on, that is! Now, before you think I'm some crazy, backwoods, swilling-it-up-in-my-backyard-shed country bumpkin, hear me out ~ APPLE. PIE. MOONSHINE. 

Really, nothing more needs to be said because hellooooo it's apple pie moonshine. And it's Fall, so anything apple is currently winning like Charlie Sheen during that weird period where we were all like what the eff is wrong with him? {Wait, that's still happening. Right.}

Last week in the mountains, Mom, Glenn, Tripp and I lingered around Gatlinburg and found ourselves in the Ole Smoky Moonshine Holler. {K, fine, we made a conscious decision to go taste-test moonshine because it's the nectar of the backwoods gods. 

I mean, let's be honest, I'll really buy anything simply because it's in a Mason jar. {We had them in the centerpieces at our wedding. That's legit obsession!}

Our second favorite ~ Hunch Punch

Overalls. Yeaaaa, buddy. Loved this guy!

The legit drinkers down this killer stuff. I truly can't hang.

 

Nonsense!

And what's a girl to do once she gets her grubby little hands on that jar? Obviously, stop at an apple orchard on the way out of town, grab some fresh cider, and make a hot mug of deliciousness!

Tearing this super adorable sticker almost made opening
the jar difficult. Almost ;)

It's Fall, y'all!

Pinky swear I'm not a total alchy. Just celebrating Fall like a true Southerner!

Plaid Fad

There's something about plaid that just screams Fall to me and I'll shamelessly admit I was so excited to pack a plaid button-up to wear in the mountains! And what better opportunity to do my first outfit post :)

{Thank you to my sweet, supportive mom for taking these pictures ~ in which I felt 110% awkward. Someone please tell me that's normal?!}

 

 

Shirt: Target
Jeans: Lucky Brand ~ Charlie Skinny {favorite jeans I've ever owned!}
Scarf: Marshalls
Boots: Target ~ Kadens Tall Rider
Jacket: Target a few years ago
Earrings: Francesca's
{So, I'm kindasortareally obsessed with Tar-jay :)}

Playing tourist

I have zero shame in being a crazy tourist, because Lord knows my mindset is generally "When will I ever see these people again?" However, I haven't always been this way. Once in NYC, Dad and I refused to let Mom approach Tom Cruise in Nobu sushi restaurant {TOM CRUISE. Yes, he's nuttier than the Whole Foods bulk section. And his teeth are too terrifyingly white. But he's still Tom Freaking Cruise and if he's in your general vicinity, you at least attempt a creepo tourist approach.} because we were too embarrassed. Looking back, duh he wouldn't have remembered us from Adam ~ I'm sure far weirder fans have asked for far weirder things than a picture or autograph!

  

Anyway, earlier this week we played ultimate Gatlinburg tourists and ate breakfast at a famous pancake house, ducked in and out of knick-knack-filled shops on the main drag, and played miniature golf!

The Pancake Pantry is one of our Gatlinburg must-dos whenever we visit. They have tons of pancakes and other breakfast items, but perhaps the most famous is the order of M&M pancakes with Peanut Butter sauce. ohmygoshsodelish! Our tradition is to each order our own full entrees but then also snag one order of M&M pancakes to share :)

Then we rode the Sky Lift up to the top of the mountain, something we haven't done since I was a little kid! It was so relaxing and an absolutely beautiful day to see the views.

Lucky ladybug landed on me on the way down the mountain :)

Then we played miniature golf, which with my family is just plain hilarious and so fun. And I made a hole in one! {Trust me, this is quite a feat, considering I'm a lefty in a family of righty golfers AND I just plain suck at all hand-eye coordination activities.}

Duh, WINNING.